Bones

Pucker's asleep on the blue and white chair. Wrapped up in a blanket. Making I Don't Feel Well Faces. Pathetic eyes. Warmish nose. I thought originally? That she'd picked up a virus outside, or ate some of that smelly mulch I cannot stand (the reddish crap that everyone uses).

The fire place blowing heat in all directions, including hers, as I was quite concerned she was truly ill.

Right this very second, I'm thrilled she feels horrendous, as apparently, when you EAT THE HAMSTER YOU FOUND ON THE FLOOR OF THE STORAGE ROOM and then VOMIT it up, it's really hard work.

ARRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH.

Now, we've been concerned that perhaps, said dog may (or may not have) ingested said hamster before - however, this time, I found the proof.

On my living room floor.

Ewww. (hmm, that seems quite the understatement of the century - and why, may I ask, couldn't she do that when J was still here? He'd have taken his Stronger Constitution and cleaned it up without all the gacking noises I made, along with dry heaving several times.)

She looks rather sickly (as she should!) - that was quite possibly THE most disgusting display of beagleness I'll Eat Absolutely Anything I've ever witnessed. I'd know. I've witnessed a lot of this behavior, discussed it with C, while walking Molly; all the wee presents one could find, if one looked more closely at ...the...er....remnants of the...ah...leftovers.

I've found Legos. Plastic palm fronds. Dinosaur feet. Yarn. A lot of fluff. Plastic tampon applicators. Water caps, the tires from Matchbook cars, actual match sticks, the keys from a dead laptop. I'd wondered how she passed the military men, (the one kneeling, holding a gun, should anyone be interested, and the one laying down taking aim with the rocket launcher in hands) but not enough to ever investigate beyond the standard "that's so freaking gross Pucker Up" - this time, there were bones.

Bones.

Jesus.

She thinks she feels ill now? Wait til I brush that bitch's teeth, and make her gargle with Listerine.

I'm not using any doggie flavored toothpaste either: it's all colgate, all the way. Extra minty.

I'll tolerate a lot in this house, but canabolism? No way.

There are bones that we eat, and bones we leave alone.

Maybe a little minty follow up will clear up any misunderstandings she had regarding the two.