Trainers.....back in training.

HMO paying for visits for someone to tell me I don't know how to be angry.

Huh. I certainly feel angry. But what to do with all of that energy?

I'm nearly to asking complete strangers - how do you behave when you're angry? - usually, I've resorted to Experimenting With My Loud Voice, hiding in a corner following rapidly on it's heels. I used to take kick boxing- going sometimes, four times a week.

I thought I was angry then.

I was angry with how my ex treated my son; now? NOW? I've finally gotten really angry with how he treated me.

Ran into C while waiting on H...naturally, she sat, and chatted while I simmered and stewed - over the dumbest things, from years ago. How long horse hair plaster takes to settle (it NEVER finishes settling). I told her being angry was beneath me. Ridiculous waste of energy - of course, she says to me, what you do - you have to get angry to move on. So, get angry. Mag's said the same thing. Get pissed. Get it out. You really will feel better.

OK. How?

Breaking things isn't acceptable, and I'm running low on things to smash ( I like the rest of the things I own!)...knitting is a little too serene for True Anger Management - so she said, didn't you mention you ran a 5K?

Take up running. Pound things into the ground. Put some serious miles between you, and then. Maybe, you'll be so tired, the nightmares won't rear their ugly head, and you'll have squashed all that stuff so much it'll feel like a bloody pulp under my toes.

Dug out running bra. Sneezed from dust on bra. Found running pants.

Tied on trainers. Leashed up dog. Told her we're running til we cannot stand, legs shaking, lungs heaving, throat sore.

Stupid bitch said in the shape we're in?

That's most likely the end of the driveway.

Sigh. Every journey starts with the first step, right?