Withdrawl...and the 7 mile program

I think I’m addicted.

To his smile. And his laugh. And his voice. And…well…..his text messages.

Mostly. The messages. They get me through the day. I know. You’re thinking how sad, pathetic and lonely I must be to be addicted to text messages for heaven’s sake - but. I will give him this: he gives GREAT text. He’s funny, and witty, utterly charming, and half the time, I find myself checking the new message, say, in CVS, and laughing out loud. At something the kids did. Or telling him something mine did - in that totally casual we’re pals kind of way - the same way that I’d sit with a girlfriend and laugh about the obese woman in flowered tight tights under daisy duke shorts, staring at ME for wearing capri pants, in the summer. Only. I don’t really want to make out with my girlfriends. Attractive, though you all may be.

I think, I’ll stick to kissing him.

And, he’s an awsome kisser. The kind that makes your neck flop bonelessly back, giving him full access to nibble up and down your neck - which before now, was an unheard activity in this house. I’m soooo not into baring my neck. It’s so….intimate. Personal. But I like the way he holds me, and hugs me like it might be the last time on earth, and how even when he’s being ultra over the top sweet, it’s still hilarious.

Like when he brings me chocolate, but it’s HIS favorite kind. Now, before? I totally would’ve thought that was a passive aggressive way to get to eat my chocolate - but, here’s the thing…he didn’t know what my favortie was, so he brought me both of his favorites, so I’d have a choice.

Yup.

sigh.

I’m a total sucker for the little things.

And now, I’m cut off, as he’s devoting his time to his kids (damn right he is) and while I fully endorse that, I’m …. missing him. And the text messaging. Which we do as often as most people inhale. And the laughing.

But…this whole distance-forced-no-contact thing has given me plenty of space (all three days of it so far) to do some thinking. I’ve made some serious progress.

Before, I just thought I liked him.

Now. I know.

I really like him